PANCAKES
AND
APPLE WARLOCKS
 |
| Zant in a hospital Gown. Animation by Trenton Brown |
DID YOU KNOW… Honey acts the same way to Pooh Bear, as Vodka acts to Humans?
Narrator: Through threatening to lose my job, I’m still here to announce. So lets do this, shall we?
BROADCASTING TODAY from Van Helsing Memorial Hospital in Boston
Van Helsing: *Looking at hospital report* Well boys looks like Striders going to make it. Though he is quite lucky to be alive… Perhaps having all this Helium in his blood will be an “Enlightening” experience for him.
Bessner: Well maybe I could give him an injection to…
Smith: Bessner? What did we talk about? Remember this is all your fault!
Pooh: Could you keep it down, Jonny? I’m still feeling the effects of the honey I drank to erase last night…
Smith: Sorry, Pooh.
Dictator Brown: *Marching in* What the (BLEEPED OUT BY THE EDITOR) is this!? Do you know how much political recourse I’m feeling because of your little stunt last night, Bessner!?
Henry: None?
Bessner: Well I…
Dictator Brown: NO! Shut up Bessner! Thanks to that fiasco France Britain Ottoman Empire are rethinking their alliance with the Brown Dictatorship!
Pooh: …I’ll be back when the yelling stops…
Smith: I understand Britain Ottoman Empire , France
Brown: France
Pooh: So in other words, just Britain
Smith: Wait, I thought you left Pooh?
Pooh: Yeah… I got around the corner and started thinking… You guys alone?
Zant: *Wheeling
*Zant is wearing a hospital gown-and little else*
Smith: Oh Gall…
Pooh: Henry? Looks like I’m not done with the honey just yet…
Henry: Are you kidding!? Vodka is the only thing blocking this!
Zant: Honey… do you mean that yellow sticky substance? *Points to the syrup which has an opaque, yellow tint to it* There wasn’t enough Syrup… so I mixed that substance with it.
Pooh: You know… Pancakes sound REAL good right now… mind if I join you Zant?
Zant: …There…. Can only be one!
*Pulls out a sword in the shape of pancakes*
Pooh: I… Need that honey.
*The two attack each other fighting over the honey laden pancakes, during which Zant frequently flashes the rest of the members…. Since hospital gowns are possibly one of the last things one should fight in, (or first depending on who you are). Van Helsing re-enters this time holding a string which is attached to Strider who is floating, bobbing against the ceiling, facing the ground.*
Smith: *Having seen Strider* OH GALL!
*hides his face in his arms*
Brown: What’s so surprising!?
Henry: THAT MAN is floating in mid… never mind just give me my (BLEEPED OUT BY THE EDITOR) Vodka!
Brown: …Don’t tell me that wasn’t your warlock’s work?
Bessner: Herr Braun, it was mine…
Brown: *Laughs* Don’t worry you can borrow…
*A handsome man in black appears wearing a fancy black kilt, a tux shirt and a Wizard Hat*
…Mine!
Handsome Man: You called my Herr?
Brown: Yes, everybody, this is my Apple Warlock he works for me in my dictatorship. His name is Nikki 6 (66) but we usually just call him Nikki the Black for short.
Smith: *looking up* …that’s not shorter.
Brown: Yes it is, what are you talking about you poor man?
Henry: Yeah, the war starting to effect you too, Corporal Smith?
Smith: Corporal!? I’m not in the army, let alone an American!
Bessner: Correction my good friend, you are a Member of the Fourth Reich.
Smith: Bessner…?
Bessner: …my apologies.
Smith: AND what the devil is an APPLE WARLOCK!?
Brown: Well since it seems that the show seems to be down a host, I’ll lend you Nikki the Black, he can be your next host till you get a new one!
Henry: That’s the best idea we’ve had since we left ‘nam! (Vietnam
Smith: I thought I was the one who was replacing Tinkerbell!
Brown: What’d you say Jonny? I’m afraid I missed that.
Smith: ….Nevermind…
*Pooh and Zant are still fighting*
Strider: ….And I thought hospitals were boring!
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