THE SHOW 10/10/2011: DICTATOR BROWN WANTS YOU!!!!!

TODAYS GUEST STAR: DANNY SUSSMAN!

Opening Theme: Skullcrusher Mountain by Jonathan Coulton 

Show: October 10^th 2011

Narrator: Ladies and gentlewomen (…and men…) we would like to welcome you… to… the best night of your lives!... er… I mean THE NORTHGLENN MORNING SHOW! Please welcome your hosts: straight out of the mental hospital for the second time, POOH BEAR. AND from Wimbledon, Britain, our beloved retired taxi driver, who has taken up reporting, JOHN SMITH. AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST! From Brown’s dictatorship the Apple Warlock: NIKKI THE BLACK!

Smith: Keep this up, random narrator and you might just keep your job.

Pooh: Lets see here… today’s news, *Sips honey* With lock in coming up check if you have enough hours and have been invited! Also as you may have noticed by the opening theme, this month’s artist is Jonathan Coulton! Today’s question for everyone: Apple Warlocks and Lemon Warlocks have begun fighting a massive silent war, do you think this will have an effect on us “muggers?” What do you think John?

Smith: *Looks over to the other side of the studio where Nikki is wrestling a random  mom down to the ground for the lemons shes holding* Nah…

Pooh: *Phone rings* Go ahead viewer!

Viewer: My answer to the question is, yes soon it will branch out into a Zombie apocalypse when someone eats a tainted lemon/ apple!

*Silence*

Smith: Sounds better than end of the world by Zant!

Henry: You know that viewers comment reminds me of this time back in Nam…

Smith: …or end of the world by Henry’s stories for that matter… *Shivers* or worst of all… end of the world be Bessner.

Nikki: Speaking of Bessner we’ve invited him to the show as our expert on apple and lemon warlocks!

Bessner: *Entering Hello everybody!

Smith: *Grumbles* Good heavens… he’s our expert?

Pooh: *Slurping his honey more loudly than usual* MMM~MMM! I’m not going to complain, I got my honey!

Smith: Get Bessner out of here!!!! *Bessner appears behind him*

Bessner: I shall give him an injection!

Smith: WAIT NO!

*Bessner gives sedative*

 ahhh….

Nikki: Thanks bessner, he was getting annoying… so what can you those *Evil moment* MEER MORTALS!!!!!!? *Returns back to normal* That was weird…

Bessner: Imagine you have lemonade, and I have apple juice and my straw comes AALLLL the way across the room and I drink your lemonade. I DRINK YOUR LEMONADE! I DRINK YOU LEMONADE!

Nikki: That’s right Apple Warlocks can steal the powers of the other warlocks!

Bessner: UND make apples appear at will, where Lemon Warlocks can make anything, ANYTHING related to lemon’s appear. Zis includes Pledge, Lemon Meringue Pie, poppy seeds und etc.

Henry: What in McArthur’s name do poppy seeds have to do with lemons?

Pooh: Lemon Poppy seed muffins.

Henry: oh…(BLEEPED OUT BY THE EDITOR)!

Bessner: In short… Lemon Warlocks can manipulate all plants and inanimate objects!

Nikki: They declared war on us this morning… this note came to us this morning…

Figure 2.1

Cultural Affairs advisor Danny: *Walking in* And what’s worse guys? The Lemon Warlocks have allied with the enemy! *Blank stares* You haven’t heard? This morning Dictator Brown received a pancake with a declaration of war written on it. Zant Ishmael Pfannkuchen escaped from a mental hospital last night and allied with an army of pastries, an unknown blond accomplice and the lemon warlocks.

Henry: This reminds me or when I found out about Vietnam…

Danny: Also… *frustrated* …sorry I have to do this guys… I hate my father(Dictator Brown) sometimes…… you’ve all been drafted by Dictator Brown… pack your bags guys.

Henry: SON OF A (BLEEPED OUT BY THE EDITOR)

Pooh: Wait… WHAT!?

Smith: *Waking up* AHH! Oh I’m back! Sorry I was having this… horrible nightmare that we were all drafted into some outrageous war!

*Silence*

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